Now What?

Every time I applied for a position, my head was full of doubt. Who did I think I was? I had no real professional experience. Was I even a professional? And every rejection seemed to confirm that. I wasn’t good enough (there goes my chance to be a professional). It is impossible to talk yourself out of that doubt. I had to be brave and reach out to family, friends, and mentors to pull me out of that hole. And when that rejection eventually came, I had to ask for reassurance. I needed their reassurance to keep applying and not settle for the part time hustle. 

After I received a rejection email from an in-person interview, I had had it. On the drive to my part time job, I called my mom crying. I had put everything into that interview. I had built myself up from rock bottom, put on makeup, and pushed my anxiety aside. And all I got was another fucking rejection email. I wanted to give up that night. I was angry with the world and wanted to watch it burn. I had felt an unfamiliar rage and it took my mom an hour to calm me down.

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Twenty Thousand Applicants Under Review

Recently the Society of American Archivist (SAA) Student and New Archives Professionals (SNAP) hosted Q&A on Twitter concerning job hunting. While I missed the conversation (it was probably a good thing because I would have been the biggest Debbie Downer), I read over the responses. In a small and competitive field it is easy to feel like you are the only one dealing with a problem. There is a Facebook page for archivists (and another for librarians) to discuss issues and ask job related questions. Usually, those pages will feature a new student or professional asking for tips on resume or cover letter writing. However, new students and job seekers rarely (if ever) are honest about the difficulties of job hunting. It was really nice to see fellow job seekers have a safe place to talk.

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